As painful as this realization is, intensely challenging situations give us the opportunity to grow in ways we otherwise might not have. It doesn’t mean that we would choose them, or that we ignore the damage they are causing. It means shifting our perspective from feeling like we are stuck forever, to realizing that no matter how bad things are, we still have options and choices.
One of the most powerful choices we can make is to decide to become better not bitter. To choose to grow rather than give up or give in. When we walk into work each day committed to our own personal development, instead of waiting for the next bad thing to happen, it changes everything. The stress begins to fade away, and we feel better mentally and physically. The ripple effect on our life diminishes as we internalize less and less of the toxicity around us. This is not to say that we can ever perfectly resist the poison that others are trying to cram down our throats. It means that if we have a choice about whether or not to take that poison in, we don’t do it. That one skills alone holds massive power to protect us.
One of the best things you can do when you are stuck in a toxic environment is to emotionally detach from the people and disinvest in the place. The best gift detachment offers us is that we start to see other people and their nonsense really, really clearly. What felt like (and no doubt was) a personal attack, now becomes merely a messed up person shouting into the wind. The power of people and places to hurt us when we practice detachment drops to an entirely tolerable degree. They are stripped of their ability to throw us off track, to wound us, to stop our progress. When we refuse to play the dysfunctional roles or follow the dysfunctional rules that have been forced upon us, we rediscover the gift of ourselves, our lives, and our dreams for the future. We are oppressed no longer. We rejoin the whole human race rather than obsessing about how things are going with the few jerks in our lives. We have the energy to play with our kids again, to love our partners again, to reengage in life again. We may take up an entirely new path or shift our lives in a far better direction.
Here are some key ways to take action to minimize the negative impact of toxic workplaces and create something positive in their place:
- Develop new skills to deal with the work issues on a daily basis
- Make mental shifts that can help you gain a fresh perspective on your situation
- Find ways to strategically detach and disinvest
- Mange your own stress
- Refuse to do anything that makes the situation worse
- Restart activities you previously loved, or begin new ones, to regain a sense of yourself outside of the workplace
Next time we will begin discussing strategies for moving forward. Until then, know that I am praying for you and believing in you!